A Clear Mind

You don’t know the true value of something until you let it go. Likewise, you only realise how parasitic something has been to you when you let it go,

We are sometimes faced with tough decisions of choice; should I say yes or should I say no? Should I pay now or should I pay later? And perhaps the most daunting of questions an investor asks; should I buy now or should I give the stock more time to shed some price?

These decisions tend to shape our future – immediate and foreseeable. They could be shaped for the best and they could be shaped for worse.

Letting an employee go may be the best decision for a business, and losing an employee may run the business to bankruptcy.

Everywhere we go, we make decisions and take actions that directly or indirectly affect us now or later.

We make business decisions, personal decisions, intimate decisions, decisions that concern us, decisions that do not “remotely” concern us (I call this ‘poke-nosing’), and decisions on behalf of people who have trusted us to make the right decisions on their behalf.

One thing that we most times end up doing is making and taking irrational and subjective decisions and actions. We end up regretting our actions and wishing we could turn back the hands of time.

But even when history repeats itself, when we are faced with the same situation as before, we still make the same mistake as before, the same misguided judgements out of our lack of foresight as before. Agreed, some of these decisions and actions are mistakes and not out of lack of foresight, while others have to be taken immediately with no time to make calculations and research for guidance in the making and taking decisions and actions.

In our every dealings and day-to-day inter-activities  we expect ourselves to make the right choices but sometimes fall short of doing this.

The key is to have a clear mind at the time we are about to make that move whether it be at the snap of a finger or after doing due dilligence and thorough research. And also very while having a clear mind is to be calm. 

Dreams Come True

Dream big dreams and you may be rewarded with gigantic realities.

Dream small dreams and you may be rewarded with stagnation.

Do not dream at all and you may end in an abyss.

There is a reward for everything one sets out to achieve.

There is a reward for every dream we have.

Martin Luther King Jr. had a dream that racism was going to be a thing of the past.

Yes we still have pockets of racism, but it is coming to be a thing of the past.

I don’t have to lie in my bed at night to sleep before I dream.

I can sit in my office, eyes wide open, staring at the white wall right in front of me, and envision how my tomorrow should be.

I can day dream as long and as much as I like. I can see the world the way I want to see it at that point.

On top of all that, I can back my dreams with action.

I can put down what I see and draw a plan to my achievement of this plan.

Because, dreams come true.


This piece is dedicated to @showieee

“Self Actualization”

Looking through Abraham Maslow’s hierarchy of needs (physiological – security – social – esteem and self-actualization) I am fascinated by the last of the needs self-actualization.
Abraham Maslow says man fulfils all the needs starting from physiological to Self-actualization, he doesn’t fulfil one need before another, and he has to follow the sequence as given above.

Physiological needs include food, shelter, clothing and sex. Maslow believes it is after this that man seeks security, then social status – the need to be recognized in society and by peers – and esteem needs which according to Maslow is in some way related to social needs and then we have the topic of discuss, Self-actualization.

Self-actualization is supposed to be the point where man has really hit his peak, a point where he says “Yes I Finally Made It”. Just as different people have different goals and objectives, so do they have different Self-actualization target.

During his hey days, President Goodluck Jonathan may say his Self-actualization target is to be the councillor of his ward in his local government area. Having achieved that, he pushes it to becoming the Local Government Chairman, and then the Governor of his State before hitting the ultimate – becoming the president of the Federal Republic of Nigeria. As seen here, having reached Self-actualization, man being an animal never contented with the status quo like Oliver Twist asks for more. The more he gets, the more he wants, and the farther he is from Self-actualization as the previous Self-actualization target becomes an esteem need and he has to set a new Self-actualization target.

Even the president of the United States cannot say he has reached his Self-actualization target by becoming president of the most powerful Nation in the world, ere still is a need probably far higher than that he feels he has to achieve.

Bill Gates could have been said to have reached Self-actualization by being the richest man in the world at one time in his life but that certainly isn’t his ultimate Self-actualization as even with the riches, he still is striving to get more.

In my opinion, Self-actualization should be a state of mind or being where man would have reached a point in his life where he has achieved what he has been sent out to do in life – spiritually, even though I believe man can NEVER perfect this state of being.
Though we cannot know all that contains in the Holy Books, and sometimes we tend to perceive what these Books say in different ways viewing them from different perspectives, Self-actualization should be a state of fulfilment where we can say we have reached the target we set out to reach in this life. A need we vowed to fulfil from birth through a covenant with our Creator. This need is a state of mind where we can say we have lived our lives as the scriptures have laid down – even though we cannot be perfect. Only then do we say we have reached Self-actualization. All others such as becoming president, most outstanding CEO, richest man in the world, UN Secretary General and the likes are all ESTEEM needs.

It is in this context therefore that we can say all of man can achieve Self-actualization regardless of age, gender, race, religion and even regardless of whether rich or poor.
I therefore DARE to say that Self-actualization is a myth, we merely circle within Esteem needs.

Be Realistic!

How possible is it for a team losing by 4 goals able to come back to win with only 2 minutes left in the match?

No matter how hard you cry or the amount of tears you shed, you can never bring back the dead. And no matter how hard you pray for long life, you are sure to die someday.

A car which has its top speed limited to 240km/h cannot go beyond its limit, no matter the modification it goes through.

No matter the amount of motivational and inspirational books you read, talks you listen to or advice you are given saying to you “yes you can” or “nothing is impossible”, you have to be realistic to the fact that there are a number of things “you can’t” or that are impossible to do.

To make informed decisions, you need to get your facts right. To get your facts right, you need to be completely objective in gathering information.

There is a limit to everything, know when you have encountered a road block, know when to stop, know when its game over.

“No Strings Attached”

Ever wondered why some people would take the interest of others above theirs? Or why some guys would be overly concerned with the situation of others that are not even remotely concerned with them.

What I have learnt in my rather short time on earth so far is that no one would pick a pin for me unless they get returns in doing that. Personal interests come first, and then every other thing follows.

We have probably been conditioned by religion where we are told to perform a deed and get rewarded for it, or it could be religion, “knowing” the way we are throws in one or two rewards for performing deeds as a motivation to make us perform.

A majority of us wouldn’t pay tithes or give offerings if we didn’t believe there is spiritual benefit attached to this action. Likewise, no one would attend school if there wasn’t a certificate attached to it that we “require” in order to get a job and live our “dream life”.

You wouldn’t go to work if there is no reward for it at the end of the day. Charity work in itself has personal interests attached to it because no one would fight for the right of other people for free.

Heck, I wouldn’t be writing this if I don’t intend leaving you with an impression or perception of myself.

There is no such thing as “no strings attached”. No one ever “just” likes you for no reason. When I do you a good deed, I expect you to have it at the back of your mind forever until its time for you to repay me, even though i may not have consciously conditioned myself so. That’s the kind of mind set we have.

It’s a Tit-for-Tat world we live in.